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revised March 24, 2011

Arrow BulletSelf Esteem: Understanding Yourself - Self-Awareness - Balancing Basic Needs

Looking at basic needs helps you to recognize what you, with all your individuality and uniqueness, need in order to feel in control, productive, motivated and happy.

Low self-esteem often leads to over-focusing on meeting everyone else's needs - to avoid risk of further rejection. When you stop asking for what you need, you lose touch even with survival needs (air, food and water, rest and activity, safety and shelter). It is fair and right to balance your needs with the needs of those you care about. This serves you better and those you care about.



How are you caring for yourself and balancing your basic needs? Doing Well
		 Here | Could Do Better
Physical 1. I eat balanced and regular meals including fresh foods and healthy snacks.
2. I get enough sleep - 6-8 hours a day on a regular basis.
  3. I feel safe in my relationships and in my environment.
  4. I take steps to protect myself in risky or unsafe situations.
  5. I have some form of physical activity at least 3 to 4 times a week.
  6. I take care of my health needs - physical, dental, eye checkups.
Emotional
& Social
7. I give and receive, warm touch, hugs and /or sexual expression.
8. I express my emotions - laugh often, cry when sad, express anger & fear.
  9. I ask for and accept nurturing from others when I need it.
  10. I have opportunities to nurture and encourage others.
  11. I have friends to celebrate with in good times, to call when I am down.
  12. I take time for fun and leisure.
Intellectual 13. I have opportunities to learn, to solve problems, to grow and to change.
  14. I do things that give me a sense of purpose, joy, and fulfillment.
  15. I make my own choices and set goals for myself.
Spiritual 16. I forgive myself for mistakes and learn from such experiences.
  17. I accept myself as unique and worthy, with strengths and weaknesses.
  18. I touch nature/ feel the sun/ see beauty at least once a week.
  19. I take time for solitude and to reflect on what is important to me.
  20. I have opportunities to live by the values I believe in.
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When your needs are met fairly consistently

  • When your needs are met fairly consistently, you have energy, you feel secure and in control, and you have room to grow. However, knowing what you need is just the starting point... you then have the responsibility of going after those needs. You cannot expect others to read your mind!  Learn to express your needs in a way that is most likely to be heard and understood. See Communication Skills: "I" Messages
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Revised: March 24, 2011

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